Tara Na!: A Love Story 2.7

  I read her message to all of us. Everyone reacted. Everyone wants to say something. Everyone is affected.  Everyone is touched. Everyone listened.

“Those are fucking lies!” Hater was the first one to explode. “Do you believe that bullcrap?!”

“I have no fucking idea… It might be, it might not.” Serious said.

“See people, if she really loves us. If she really wants us to feel that she loves us she will not those fucking excuses! She will not make us feel this fucking way!” Hater shouted. “It’s my fucking turn, so sit back and enjoy the ride.”

“If she loves us, she will not do this fuck. If she loves us she won’t make us feel like crap! She loves?!? She LOVES us!?!! Are you fucking insane!? Okay!? She loves us like shit! Whenever we talk to her, WHAT!? She makes us feel nothing! NOTHiNG! Oh I know! Ha! I know! She said all those crap to make us become more DEEPLY, MADLY, INSANELY fucking IN LOVE with her!!. But, the hell with that shit. I felt that she mean those words, but he created me this way. AND I WILL STAY THIS WAY! I’m more than meets the eye! But I am yours, no matter what you wish to do, I will gladly, and hatefully will absorb the blows and hugs.”

He did not make a us after he talked. He just slowly sat down and smile at everyone’s approval and disapproval.

“That was fucking boring… I guess it’s my fucking turn.” Serious stood up and walked to the podium. “We will do it fast and easy, I will not say any fancy shit.”

“Since I knew her, I changed. Positively changed, negatively changed. From good to better, from bad to worse. But now, I’m in my best, also in my worst condition. It is the mixed feeling of hate and love. It is the mixed feeling of guilt and anger. It is the mixed feeling of loving you and hating you. I know you will read this, or someone you know will tell you what is happening here. I am trapped in the middle of nowhere. I have no idea what to do or say. I did all the things I can do. I said all the things I need to say. But it always seems they are not enough, it is always declined, refused, dumped and not heard. At the same time, I am very happy to have a girl in my life like you. You’re the only who made me feel this way, this funky way. I had a dream last night, you went in our house we drink coffee together. When I ask you where have you been, you said that you were in your suitor’s house. When I ask you if you say yes, are you gonna leave me. You said ‘maybe’. MAYBE. The answer I always get. MAYBE. That you know I absorb as a YES. It was a dream. It was just a dream. I wished it ends because it almost made me cry. I don’t want you to leave me. Also I wish it would not end, because in that dream; we were drinking coffee. COFFEE. The beverage I drink the most. The beverage I love. In that dream, I have both things I love. I kept my eyes close to burn the images in my mind. I was standing next to you, shoulders touching. I always got the feeling. The feeling that I want to push you away, but at the same time push myself to you. On what you had written, it is all true. There are some exaggeration, but still they are true. I know that you know I love you. There are no argument. I love you, and I always will. No matter what. I miss you.”

Serious sat down, he looked to me. I give him an approval nod. He smiled, then put down his head.

Liar stood up, it his turn. I switch my state of mind. I know he will lie. I know I will not believe any word he will say. All the words that come out of his mouth will have it opposite as a truth.

“Errrr… I don’t love her. I’m not hurt. I’m okay. No! I don’t miss her! No! I don’t want to miss her. No! I don’t want to talk to her. No! I have more girlfriends! No! I don’t love her. No! I don’t love her!!!”

Liar ran out of the exit. No one say anything. I stood up. I know that we know if a guy is missing the system will not work.

“Ok. We heard some of our most actives.” I said. “I guess we will see tomorrow.”

Everyone stood up quickly, and ran out the door. They swarmed the door. They will run after the Liar. Not to beat him up, but to help him. Hater and Serious was the only ones who talked their minds today, but I know everyone will give their speeches soon.

Then again. I was alone.

“I will not wait today” I said to myself. “It has happened before, I’m sick of waiting.”

But I waited. 

No one of us wants to end this…